Our children respect authority as much as Rudy Giuliani respects the sanctity of marriage. By age 18, the average high school senior has done as much drugs as Cindy McCain. Video games are teaching them that horrific violence is ok even if you are not following the President’s orders. Our children are not learning proper values. To teach them through example would mean that we would have to clean up our own acts. So instead, I propose a national service program.
Now, to pay a adult less than $6.55 an hour to work is exploitation. But to make a teenager work for free builds character. Forcing them to do volunteer work for the government will make them loyal, patriotic citizens. The government can in turn sell that labor to US companies, helping America compete in the global sneaker industry and helping to reduce the deficit at the same time. As a bonus, the parents get to spent time away from the kids. Everybody wins.
To view the original Modest Proposal, click here.