Wednesday, April 01, 2015

Hoosier Pride!

There has always been some bias against Hoosiers. Many Hoosiers claim to be born that way, but conservatives and liberals insist that it is a lifestyle choice. In fact, there are “recovering Hoosiers” in 49 states. The federal government requires Hoosiers to carry ID cards that identify ourselves as such when we try to board a plane. But you don’t see Muslims having to carry Muslim ID cards or Christians having to carry Christian ID cards. It’s like we are being singled out.

There are many stereotypes about Hoosiers. Outsiders think we all wear plaid or Ed Hardy shirts. They think we all work on farms, or at least use that as a cover story when we try to buy anhydrous ammonia and a suitcase full of pseudoephedrine. They think of Hoosiers as people who put Confederate flags on their Ford pickup trucks even though Indiana is a northern state and everyone knows that General Lee and Jeff Davis were diehard Chevy owners.

There are many subcultures within Hoosier subculture. There are folks up in Noble County who “warsh” their dishes. There is Harrison County where people talk like Dukes of Hazzard characters. And there is Lake County, a foul abomination that should be given back to the British. I happen to be a “metro-Hoosier”. I can usually pass for a non-Hoosier while on the East Coast unless I slip up and try to order a pop at a restaurant.

Hoosiers are very spiritually diverse. We worship deities like Jesus, Yahweh, and He Who Walks Behind the Rows. Yet many of us have concerns about RFRA. Specifically, many of us are concerned that Bill Belichick might claim that his Sith religious beliefs are protected when he chokes people to death from 10 feet away in Lucas Oil Stadium. (The NFL needs to start testing for midichloridians. And there is good in you yet, Tom Brady. I can feel it.)


This may be Indiana, but it’s still America. And I hope that everyone else will accept us for who we are. At least we deserve more tolerance than what George Takei has for theTwilight Series. And when I think of rednecks and homophobes, I think of Kid Rock and Eminem. And those guys are from Michigan. So there.

1 comment:

Michael Enders said...

As a misplaced Hoosier who finds himself living in Connecticut, I can confirm that the official state religion of both states is basketball.